In the midst of things

I'll do a short update before I head to bed.

Eugene and Nicholas came to work today, feels good having people you know around, despite all the shit.

I've got to learn this.

Tomorrow is a brand new day

ie, stop stop stop stop worrying about the previous days calls and get ahead with the new day. I'll suffer from a mental breakdown if I keep worrying. I mean, to hell with them yeah! It's nothing to do with me anyway.

Keep it cool, keep it cool.

I've been missing Yu Le Bai Fen Bai ): VERY SAD, VERY SAD INDEED.

I may have to work till the end of Feb. NOOOOOOOO THE HORRORRRRRR.

Sigh, can this week please pass fast and let the next week come faster please.... Why not just let the month of Feb pass ASAP, I need a break.

I MISS 121. I could sense the difference when I went back for CVD that day, and it's kinda sad. Oh well, I've no say in this. I guess some things just turn out differently, as people change, as time passes. Still, great memories (: We'll all remember them yea.

Right now, I'm pretty much satisfied with my life, apart from the crappy and stressful job, which I've to admit can be quite tolerable. At least I'm not as tied down as before, and at least I know that there'll be an end to this.

I can't figure my point here, but yea, whatev.

I feel ready for the changes in my life, bring it on! (:




I STILL LOVE FEILUNHAI AND YALUN VERY MUCH THANK YOU :D

/edit: You've gotta check our blogshop out (since the item which has my photo has already been taken down) THE SHORT TRIP! Updated with new items woohoo!


brush em aside, and pray that they'll go away

Dead end

I'M FREAKING TIRED.

CROWN ME THE OFFICIAL WORKOHOLIC. I've been working from 9am to 9pm for the past few days without going out for lunch.

Reason being, I'm just too lazy to get lunch and I don't feel hungry anyway. I hate the job though, seriously. Some people (actually make that ONE) of a higher authority greatly pissed the SHIT outta me today, pushing all her dirty work to ME, then making me clear up all the SHIT. And I fucking HATE her fucking attitude.

I'm so gonna quit on the 15th of Feb. Cos if I quit anytime earlier the pay would be $5.50 instead of $6. SUCKS.

I hate how messy the way the company runs, but I'm gonna deal with it for 17 more days (or less, with the CNY holidays and Sundays).

Think of the money think of the money think of the money.

On the good side, I received my previous pay today, not much, but YAY. MONEY!! :D

Off to bed now, before I fall asleep in front of the laptop.

Goodnight!

Shiat

I can't believe this. After so much contemplation and consideration on what to put for my choices, I have effing regrets now.

1. NP Business
2. TP Busniess
3. NP Accountancy
4. TP Business IT
5. NP Business IT
6. SP Business
7. NYP Business
8. SP Business IT
9. TP Psychology
10. TP Retail Management
11. SP Mass Comm
12. NP Early Childhood


I want to push NP Accountancy lower I'm effing scared I get into that course and have to deal with numbers all my life. NOOOO I donno why I thought it was ok yesterday I think I was not in the right state of mind omg I'm gonna change now update later when I'm less paranoid.


LATER I ALL TWELVE CHOICES CANNOT GET IN HOW OMG FFFFFFFFFF.
DAMN PARANOIDDDDDDDDDDDDD.

Like a papercut

I felt it, that strange emotion. It's there, not strong enough for me to make any movements, any decisions. But still, it's there.

Perhaps if I'd done something about it earlier, but then again maybe not. That's what I have, all the hesistations. Too afraid that I'm just thinking too much, too afraid that it might just be what I'm thinking. Yea that's probably what I am, just a coward, shying from all my emotions. I push them away and assure myself that it's just too much thinking on my part. But then again, is it really?

I'm not sure, not sure of anything at all. And I'm too tired to think, too tired from work.

Perhaps when I finally get down to understanding what all these emotions are about, it'll be too late. And maybe, that'll be the better outcome. Maybe that's how it's meant to be..


张韶涵-亲爱的,那不是爱情


This song makes me tear

Vroom vroom

Damn tired. First day of work I OT-ed till 930pm.







AND I MISSED GONG ZHU XIAO MEI BECAUSE OF WORK.

Effffffffffffffffffffffffffffff. Customer service is SHIAT. Prefer doing admin stuff. Customers make me feel stupid, because they ask questions that I can't answer.

My first day of work only leh. And everyone's so busy. No one to ask.




SHIATTTTTTTTTT. But okay, plus thing is that time pass very fast, and that I can earn loads of money cos of OT.


Woohoo.

K bye, gonna sleep.


P.S. I'm gonna miss watching Yu Le Bai Fen Bai! ):

Yay

I found a job. Great, cos it's only 5 stops away from home wooooohooooo! (: I'm thinking of my pay even before I start working. Hahahaha.. :D

Release of O level result tomorrow. Which means I've to thoroughly think through ALL the course and decide on which to apply. Have done so already, more or less that is.

1. NP Business
2. TP Business
3. TP Marketing
4. NP Business IT
5. TP Business IT
6. NYP Media

Not sure what to put for the 6th choice though. Really do not like NYP. Lol.

ALL THE BEST FOR PEOPLE TAKING RESULTS! (:

Wanted to go back to KCP but then I found a job!

*hops around and starts planning of what to buy after I get my pay*


T.T I really need a financial advisor.

I have not even completed one module for my sister's friend! GOSHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.

Byeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.

Lost sight of oneself

I am supposed to help my sis colleague with her assignment cause she has too much to handle. But for the past two hours all I've came up with is a sentence, and spent the rest of the time blog-hopping.

It's damn effing cheem, Uni work God damn it. Gonna try wake up tomorrow to at least complete 2 out of 4 modules.


I've always admire people who are sure of who they are, have their own image and way of life.

I wish I am like that too, cos I'm losing sight of myself. I'm living my life as if it's on repeat. Cos I do the same effing thing every effing single day.



I swear I'm gonna do something drastic to my hair when I get money, and hopefully the green light from my mum.

Effing sick of bored of the mundane old me.



F.

It's not that good being tall

My house has renovation works going on, so there're like make-shift pathways for people to walk through. And these pathways are of a certain height. Usually, I take extra caution of bending down while walking through, because they're not really high. But today...........







WHAM, I bang into the metal rod damn bloody effing hard okay!

Damn embarrassing, but I think no one saw. Wasn't the main point, the main point is, IT EFFING HURT. I was dazed for a moment lah, but had to pretend nothing was wrong and continued walking. LOL.

One of the many other reasons why I hate being tall. Don't get me started on the rest. Like how cute guys are usually short. Urgh.

***

I don't quite understand the proverb you can't have your cake and eat it too. Or something along that line.

Cannot eat then buy cake for what ah?

***

I'm broke like kjf;asdlgkl;kdfjjtokjkaf. And my pay only comes on the 28th! AHHHHHH. 6 more days 6 more days 6 more days.

I NEEEEEEEEEEEED A JOBBBBBBBBBBB NNNOOWWWWWWW.

Materialistic needs (more like wants)

I plan to buy

- W580i in metro pink
- Pink Sony Vaio
- PSP in rose pink
- Sony cybershot in pink

after I've earned enough money. I swear I'll be a walking ad for Sony. LOL.

I just love the metallic shade of pink Sony has for its items. So pwetty! (:


I'm so into makeup shopping now. *gasps*
I love the stuffs Canmake has! And the Japan brand Majolica Majoca! So pretty.

I got my Fei Lun Hai autographed album and poster today. YAY :D

I want to watch Sweeny Todd. And Jumper.

Okay bye, gonna watch Huang Jin Lu now!


I feel like eating chui kueh. LOL

I love mumsy

A few days ago, I was just talking to my mum about my sister, who seems to have been abducted by aliens ever since she has gotten herself a new boyfriend.

And my mum said,

"I"m really disappointed with her."

So am I, mum. So am I.

Ever since she's gotten together with this guy, who does not fall into her category of dateable, she has been coming home in the wee hours of the morning, and that is if she comes home. She doesn't, half the time.

Ok, fair enough, the guy's funny and sometimes nice. But he tends to be irritating, at least to me he is. Take just now for example, my sis was checking her emails and doing her work, and he was like disturbing her, then said that he wanted to go off cos my sis not accompanying him blahblahblah

For God's sake. I don't know how my sis can tolerate him.

She's like losing her ability to judge what's right and what's wrong, and where to cross the line. It makes me mad to see my mum get angry cos of her irresponsibility and nonsense.

She can like stay over his house throughout the weekends WHEN HE LIVES JUST 10 MINS AWAY FROM MY HOUSE.

WTF sis, WTF.

She wasn't so "sticky" to her other boyfriends before lah. It befuddles me.

I wonder if she realises that both my mum and I doesn't really respond to her rants on her boyfriend. Reason being, we really don't like the change in her ever since she's gotten attached.

It's really infuriating.

My mum has given up trying to talk sense into her. Because all she says is, "Aiyah my friends also all like that what"

That because your "friends" are those hanging out with him you dumbass.

I hope this shit stops soon. Either when she finally sees how drastic she's changed, or they break up.

Evil as it is, I would prefer the latter.

A sudden realisation

I am very worried now.

















Fucking scared that I cannot go into any course and ends up being a kopitiam coffee brewer.

Sigh.

Because it scares me

My eyes are hurting, and red as ever, all thanks to my gehkiang-ness of wearing contacts today. Okay, I'll swear off contact lenses. At least till CNY. I cannot stand it. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO MEEEEEE. I really wanna wear contacts lah! It's like so much more convenient albeit less comfortable........ Argh.

Today was funny, I can't stop feeling hungry. I weighed myself this morning and I lost 2 kgs! Zzzzomg. So cannot start anyhowly eating again. But I'm craving for pizza. And sushi. I don't know why I always crave for these two at the same time. LOL.

My first try on guitarfreaks lasted for a mere say, 30 seconds? Okay lah, maybe a minute. Damn funny, but felt damn bad cos we (Me with Eugene and Joshua) were playing the combined one, so they lost a credit because of meeee! Guitar is not for me. Hahahaha I told them I cannot already! LOL. Ohhh, I tou lan-ed! Damn damn damn damn fun :D The balls kept flying out and one hit Eugene's head! :x hahaha

Still love tou lan-ing.

Afterwhich we (now with Terence) headed to play pool....... Didn't really feel like it, because well.. Yea. Still did in the end, after like what, two years of not playing? But it was fun!!! Hahahah I teamed up with Joshua and we lost! Eugene and Terence won lah, wth. Damn funny cos all our losses are like the black ball go in but not the pocket chosen. T.T

Yea. Still prefer tou lan-ing.

NP OPEN HOUSE WITH MELI TOMORROW! :D

because I know it'll bring back memories, because I don't wanna get reminded.
I did. still did.

Three two one

I feel like shite now. Am actually trembling a little. God knows why. I feel so weak lah, argh. Hate this sick feeling...............

At first I thought it was because I didn't eat anything the whole day, so I ate my dinner at like 8? But I still feel it now! Goshhhhhhh. This is irritating.

I need a job. Any lobangs?

LOVE LOVE LOVE. Have been you-tubing about them, who else! (:

Byebyebyebye.

Oh, you guys should watch the kang xi lai le with host Selina and guest Xiao Zhu, it's freaking funny!

I still want to live in Taiwan. ):

In-so-mia

I had the most hilarious dream last night. Consisting of scenes from Harry Potter, my JC friends in KCP (WTH!), me being late for school and some other nonsensical and weird scenes. LOL. I haven't been able to sleep well past few nights. All thanks to my flu which has morphed into an all-time headache. Welcome back, my friend. T.T I seriously think there's something wrong with my health.

Last night I accompanied my mum to some vegetarian dinner. Zzzomgosh. I don't like.

My house is having some renovation works going on and it's making my headache worse.

I miss my girlies. Speaking of which, I haven't bought my secret santee her present. :O

My pay is not here yet. -.-

I want Chinese New Year to come sooooooon!

Okay, bye, I'm going to youtube now.

Because the scenes keep running in my head

Songs I love from 双面飞轮海 ranked in order:

1. Ti Amo
2. 一万个快乐
3.为你存在
4. 心里有数
5. 爱的王道 edit
6. 至少还有我
7. 明日香 /edit.
8. 新窝

I love love love love Ti Amo. Actually, I love the album on the whole, even more than their first. Cos they improved on their singing! :D <333333333

So handsome! :D

I want to tou lan.

PS. I think I might change my url soon. Soon.

飞轮海 & S.H.E.- 新窝

感受不易形容
就算会有一点唐突也要说
请搬进我心窝
如果你不幸福再离家出走
我心窝做你的新窝
也许坪数不太够
甚至会拥挤到
只装得下你我
请快准备行李
丢掉用不到的伤心旧回忆
脑海中 相本日记
从此更新
只有彼此专属甜蜜
抱枕就丢掉
有肩膀就够
最后用关心问候
捆绑我们的手完工
只要 在你身边
我就 省掉思念
时间 只用来眷恋
我要 在你身边
尽情 浪费喜悦
也许 一待就永远
管它金窝银窝
怎样都比不过彼此的心窝
打包一箱温柔
今后多多指教就相互宽容
你心窝做我的新窝
暖气不需要使用
我已经温暖到
融化所有冷漠
请快准备行李
丢掉用不到的伤心旧回忆
脑海中 相本日记
从此更新 只有彼此专属甜蜜
抱枕就丢掉
有肩膀就够
最后用关心问候
捆绑我们的手完工
只要 在你身边
我就 省掉思念
时间 只用来眷恋
我要 在你身边
尽情 浪费喜悦
也许 一待就永远
只要 在你身边
我就 省掉思念
时间 只用来眷恋
我要 在你身边
尽情 浪费喜悦
也许 一待就永远(一待就永远)

Love this MV, love this song! Fei Lun Hai and S.H.E. so cuteeeee! <3333333

It feels like de javu

Two horror movies in a row for two consecutive days?!

Yes, all thanks to my wonderful friend Eugene. Hahahaha damn it lah, and I really hate watching horror movies. But watching it with them made it seem like a comedy. Cos they kept laughing.. Haha.. I had to admit that the body #19 was rather hilarious because their graphics were really lousy. LOL. One missed call was okay lah. Stupid, and they told me it was about a serial killer. So got conned. -.- Was as usual covering my eyes half the time.

My eyes have decided to go on a strike against contact lens again, even after I bought the more expensive O2 Optix. Bloody FFFFFFFFFFFF. Really sad. ): My eyes will be bloodshot if I wear contacts for more than 2 days in a row.

I just realised that I didn't know a lot of KCP people back in my secondary school days. Hmmm..

Got to meet up with Cherlyn and people for a while today! (: Felt damn happy lah, cos I miss hanging out with them..

Ok gonna cook myself maggi mee soon! (:


perhaps all the emotions I felt were just part of my imagination

Breathe easy

I wanna cut my hair a little shorter. Can't wait till my pay comes before I head to the hairdresser again. This year I feel recharged, like it's finally time to mooooove on, live and let live, start anew, start afresh, for a brand new year. Finally, because no one knows how I've been living in the haunts of my memories beneath my facade. So yes, this will be it. (: And this time, I know I can do it.

I've high hopes set on this year, hopefully it wouldn't be a disappointment to me. It's time for something new, something exciting in my bloody mundane life! This is why I actually am excited about going to Poly. Hahaha, no big deal, you may say, Poly only what. But if you've been through a year of JC life, especially in YJC, it would be a big deal. At least for me, it is.

Oh yes, JIAYOU FOR BLOCKS CTG 220!!! Still love you people! Hahaha..

Alright, I love each and every song in Shuang Mian Fei Lun Hai, rocks. Back to playing Kingdom Hearts on PS2 with Goofy, Donald and Sora! Hahaha

Love.

Shuang Mian Fei Lun Hai!

Got my CD today! Damn happy happy happy!! :D

Can't wait for my pay, gonna go for a huge shopping spree! Have so much in mind, tops, bags, dvds...... many many!

Went back to YJ yesterday, missed 121 so much. It'll be a stressful year for them this year, JIA YOU! (:

***
I can't understand my dreams. I really can't. Do I really....?


Yet I still choose to not do anything, not to sort my thoughts out, not to reassure my feelings. It'll be over soon. Soon...
***

I'm sick and tired of being afraid.

A new start to a new year

(:

It's the second day of 2008!

Okay, I am so so late in making those new-year/what-have-you-accomplished-in-2007 posts! All thanks to the Batam trip which left me totally tired out, not forgetting waking up at 730am the following day (New Year's Eve) to accompany my mum to her checkup, then reaching home only at 2am that night because I was at IMM counting down with Fahrenheit. Wahahahaha!

So what were the most memorable events in 2007?

1st would definitely be meeting FeiLunHai for the first time! :D Which made me totally go gaga over them up till now. Hahaha!


I met lovely people from lovely CTG121, who were there with me throughout the whole tedious year! (:

I donated blood for the first time! And I wanted to donate again so many times, I finally went to the bloodbank @ HSA on Monday.... only to realise that they do not open on Mondays! -.-

Miss Chen's Wedding! :D

The whole journey through PW with my great PW mates Fel, Xin Er, Royston, Xesman. (: YJ090 rocks. Haha!

I've grown closer to my girlies, probably due to our different schedules and hence we do not take each other for granted as much as we did before. LOVE YA JAS*HM!

I started online shopping. Should. So Stop. It. LOL. And I think I broke the record of buying the most clothes in a year! Thanks to my dear mummy who kept paying and paying. I promise I'll pay her back when I get my pay! :D Love ya mummy!!!

I overcame my vanity and wore my specs for more than two months. (:

I worked for 2 weeks! Hahaha

Yep. That should be about it.


What do I wish for year 2008?

Great health to all my loved ones, especially mummy. (:

I'm turning 18 gosh! I hope I don't turn into one of those girls who goes clubbing 24/7. Please no!

Keep in contact with CTG121! As well as other friends who played a major role in my life in one way or another! (:

Grow closer with JAS*HM girlies!

Meet Fahrenheit again! LOL.

For my wish to come true.


And that 2008 will be the greatest year ever! (: