Like so many times, so many times before

Sometimes I think my sister is really awesome. I just wish she can have a better boyfriend. Much better, in fact.

I think Wang Zi can't sing leh......... Channel V playing his MV now. Hahahaha quite nice the song but I don't like his voice!

***
Lately I've been spacing out every now and then, just thinking about everything that's going on right now or happened in the past.

I feel like I haven't been myself in the longest time.

I do things that I wouldn't do in the past.
I don't do things that I would do in the past.

Feels pretty weird like everything's so not me. But what's me?

I feel like no one knows who I am, probably cos everyone around me are people whom I've just met.
Even friends whom I've known for a year plus, do not know.

I guess I brought this upon myself cos I am such a expert in living under my facade.
Too good at it I think I'm becomng emotionless.
Not hanging out with people close to me lately made me close up within my own space even more.
Like a hermit.

Or have I been cooped up in this space ever since then?
I guess it totally made me a different person.

I used to be really rash at times and look at me now.
I hesitate and ponder over countless outcomes, not even daring to make any decisions.

What's with such extremes.

Aah, it must be the weather cos I'm feeling fucked up now.

***
Looks like another one of my pointless post.

I try hard not to think about it but it seems like the harder I try the more it gets to me. _l_

“恨总比爱容易放下”

Really? But neither way works.

Nothing works.