It's not enough

I forgot how it was. All the words I planned to say, I had them ready. Yet I forgot how there'll always be a rebuttal of some sort, words of skeptic, words of negativity.... words that hurt. It's like ripping apart a healing wound.

I was mad. Upset, hurt, disappointed. All the reasons laid out were just mere excuses. Excuses made for fear. Fear of getting hurt again. It couldn't have been more ironic, one who loves taking risks cowers in fear when faced with love. Yet I had a part to play for this very fear and no amount of apologies will fix anything.

Some part of me wants to give up loving all together.

Why love? When all it does is bring you pain.
Why love? When you can have more money to yourself.
Why love? When you're strong yourself.

What hurts the most.. You and I both know how money tears families, relationships and friendships apart. Yet you are letting this very reason be one of the reasons to this. Is that even acceptable? How... could you?

Being stronger does not necessarily mean better. Sure, if I shut off these emotions I'd be one hell of a strong bitch because caring makes you weak. Wild hearts can't be broken, that's what they all said no? But that would mean giving up on who I was, the values I've been brought up with. That would mean.. not being me anymore.

If you think what you're doing is for the best for me, the same words I say to you. It's not up to you to decide for me.

Don't let your wounds define who you are. For now, I'd be the better me, even if it kills me.