Growing up

Been hooked on watching The Carrie Diaries lately - mainly for Sebastian Kydd - but also because I'm at a point in my life when I miss those teenage days and don't feel like growing up anymore.

I'll be turning 24 this year, so not cool. Having all the responsibilities of being an adult sucks, like paying your own bills, having to worry about things like health insurance and money mostly. Everything just gets more complicated. Love is no longer just love. You have the future to think about, you have things like marriage and housing and starting a family. Oh I don't wanna get there yet.

I FEEL SO OLD. It's like I'm too young to think about settling down yet too old to still jump from relationships to relationships. Neither here nor there. It's at this age when you start dealing with changes. You are at a stage in your life and your friends or other halves could be at a different stage in their lives and that can be pretty hard to deal with.

And at this age, it's when people start working towards what they want in life, fulfilling their dreams. Some are even halfway there.

Me?
.
.
.
.
.
I have no idea what I wanna do in life.

Part of me wants to get out of living a boring, mediocre life and believes I'm made for something more. And the other part of me? Just feels contented with what I have. Like I should just stick to the norm and live day by day like an average person until I die.

Watching The Carrie Diaries inspired me to start writing again. I have loved writing all my life but I've never thought about doing something about it. Heck I couldn't even motivate myself to keep up with this blog. But that's more of a privacy issue, I guess.

And I guess.... this is just another random incoherent rant. Quite a rare sight on this blog these days.


PS. I'M SO EXCITED TO START SCHOOL TOMORROW! Crossing my fingers for a great year ahead. X